Distraction conquered

This post is mostly for me to write but of course your welcome to read it. I just need to get it out there, its part of casting out lies.

Yesterday was a wonderful day with the Lord. I spent its entirety cleaning and worshiping, mostly alone and when I wasn't alone with wonderful company. I loved yesterday. See my post below.

Today I awoke to the beautiful sunshine and upon walking outside had this thought. 'Without rainy days, I'm rarely grateful for sunny ones.' I mean, is that not soo true?? Its been incredible here lately. Sunny day after sunny day? Then we had this horrible weather over the weekend, which we all complain about, only to be followed by the bright sunshine on a Sunday morning. So what do we do? We are thankful for the sunny Sunday! Because for a brief moment, we forgot what it was like!

Its like my experience in East Asia. If you don't know, the weather in East Asia is far from attractive. In fact, painful. Its gloomy and foggy, hardly sunny. So when the sun does sneak in and you get a glimpse of its rays, you can't help but praise God for its light! Its soo wonderful!

All that to say, that was my reflection on the way to church-it was quite wonderful. I was thrilled and happy to be on my way to worship with a body of believers I love.

Then, something shifted. I walked in, things played out like they normally do. I sat down, the service started and something triggered in me. I started thinking about all the things I still had to do before my departure for EA. The notebooks, visas, emails, money, etc. There are so many details and so little time to do it in. Worship was playing in the background and I was doing everything I could to focus. My mind shifted to support as it often did and I became discouraged. My summer is rather expensive as most overseas trips as and I've seen very little of my total need come in. I still need over $4500 to avoid deficit. That thought consumed me. I lived in the thought of 'even though I've asked dozens of people, spoken at church, sent out a few letters, and told people about my trip the money is not coming in.' Its a dangerous place to stay. I couldn't focus. Makes you realize the everyone comes into church with different baggage and distractions.

The best I could, I put that number at the foot of the cross. My thoughts and prayers seemed jumbled. All I could think to do was to celebrate other's support. Like my roommate who has seen God do great things this week. Or the way that several of my summer project teammates have seen 1000 supporters this week, as we prayed for. I remembered, God is good. In fact, God is good even when my support is not there. My prayer in that moment was that I would remember that. Remember that if I miss a paycheck and the gospel advances, it will ALWAYS be worth it. If I miss two paychecks, and the gospel advances, its still worth it. And even further, God is still good. Even then. God still is my provider even when support is not abundant. This I know to be true in the Word.

The moments that followed were moments I seemed to be a little tuned out but moments of sweet love from my Father. Thankfully so, I needed that. I'm still lacking faith that my support will come in. Its much easier for me to say a simple prayer than for me to believe it. I'd cherish your prayers if you would pray for me to believe Jehovah Jireh to provide for my needs. Pray for my support.

I unashamedly ask if you want to be a part of what God is doing in East Asia through me and my team, I'd love for you to join me. I'm privileged to lead the team there this summer. You can give directly online at https://give.ccci.org/give/View/0595651 Thank you in advance for your generous giving. May the gospel advance and the Kingdom come.

Blessings.