Tapping into me

Training is going well. Really, it is. We meet from 830-1230 everyday and then most days we go until 3 with some other type of meetings.

I've enjoyed the focus of the meetings, because they focus on our position focus--for as long as I'm a MTL, I think I'll remember my role :) The other meetings and groups have also been helpful as they are in place to discuss and process with one other.

I realized a few things today. As leaders, we rarely talk about ourselves. Right now, I bet you just thought of an exception. What I'm talking about though is we rarely are the ones being asked because we are always the one doing the asking. This training has been focused on our hearts, thus digging deeper into some of the issues and thoughts we are wrestling with.

Its refreshing. Its challening. Its frustrating. Its life giving.

I don't think I have talke this much about myself and how I'm feeling in a long time. What its revealing is that its a great need. I need deeply to tap into some deep places in my heart and know the struggles I'm combatting.

I was meeting with Millie today. We were working through Bamas Strategic Plan and then quickly onto my own personal development plan. In order to get to that, I had to answer a lot of questions. I had a moment where I realized something that I'm really dealing with. I'd been thinking about it for a while but when I was verbalizing it, it all just made sense. I needed that moment and am thankful for it!

Now I'm at a place that I can work through the struggle and continue to grow. Its a beautiful thing what happens when you begin to tap into yourself. Right now, I'm tapping into me.

When I get back to Bama, thats how I want to lead. I want to lead out of my heart--I want to lead in such a way that people around me know me and know my struggles. The real me. All of it, even if its messy.